How's Your Heart?

The word "heart" is used 75 times in the book of Proverbs. That is what Beth Moore told Hannah and me as we were working through an online study this morning.

Proverbs 4:23
Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life.

Whether we like it or not, our heart is a wellspring, and whatever is in it will spew out constantly on our surroundings and unsuspecting 'victims.' My heart is dangerous--not only to myself, but especially to others.

Other translations of the Hebrew word translated "wellspring" are exit, boundary, source, outgoings and my favorite ISSUES. Just take a moment and substitute each of these words for wellspring in the verse above. They each speak to me in a different way--and add to my understanding.

We were challenged by this question--"How is your heart?" I had to think about that one. Who or what does my heart really belong to? In my head, I would tell you that the answer, of course, is Jesus. But what do my actions say? What does the 'spewage' (not a word--but very descriptive!) communicate?

Have I really given Him my heart--or am I still protecting it. Not really trusting God with the most precious, personal and dearest part of me. Our heart is our deepest treasure.

It is the most difficult thing for me to surrender to Him. At first glance, it may seem that it may be harder to surrender other areas in my life--children being utmost, husband, dreams, health, etc--but the reality is, that it is my heart that I am afraid will be broken. I just don't trust Him completely.

What if I surrender wholeheartedly my heart to God, and something tragic in my life occurs to those I deem most precious? Can I still trust that the God who I've given my heart to is worthy of that love-- that He will heal and bind that heart and that He is truly a good God that will work all things for my good?

I have grown leaps and bounds with that trust--and I know the right answers in my head, but I must admit I still wrestle in my heart.

I'm thinking that surrendering my heart--giving it to Him completely is not a one time shot. Maybe it's more like 're-gifting,' over and over, a million times a day, if necessary, whenever I feel it creeping and crawling, sometimes running, away from Him.